Be Happy Make Happy

I started my own little campaign. It's called Be Happy Make Happy.

Why?

Because I have had to realize very quickly that people and events will make me sad and how I react to them will determine how I make others feel.

Little things have happened around me that caused a serious wave of anxiety, anger, betrayal, the list goes on.  Bottom line, intentionally or not, people have done things that to me seem unprofessional and lacking of good moral character.  My immediate response was to run and find them and ask them WHY did you lie, WHY did you betray my trust, WHY couldn't you extend me the professionalism and courtesy I deserve.  Thankfully I had too much to do, too many kids to entertain and I had to exercise self control.

After a good nights rest and reading several pages of inspirational quotes and stories my mind was once again at peace. 

I place a high moral value on the way people behave. I find it repellent to have a lot, and to behave with anything other than courtesy in the old sense of the word - politeness of the heart, a gentleness of the spirit."~ Fran Lebowitz

This was the first quote I found and it was the one that started the process of letting go.  Understanding in my own mind that while I expect people to be courteous it doesn't mean it's going to happen and I need to learn to let go.

My friend Lori later sent me this little quote in FaceBook:

Speak when you are angry--and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.- Laurence J. Peter

This really hit closest to my heart because I was ready to send a typed message saying everything that was going through my head, in the end I did not and IT was the best decision I'll never regret.  Today, Sunday morning I woke up feeling refreshed and thinking only of how I could continue to bring happiness to the people in my life, the people that matter.  So I visited my friend Lance at the Jungle of Life and found this truly amazing quote:

"What you do for yourself – any gesture of kindness, any gesture of gentleness, any gesture of honesty and clear seeing toward yourself – will affect how you experience your world. In fact, it will transform how you experience the world. What you do for yourself you're doing for others, and what you do for others, you're doing for yourself." ~ Pema Chödrön

This message sums it all up for me.  Treating myself with civility, kindness, love, and honesty help me to do the same for everyone else.  No matter what you do or say or how I may feel in the moment, I will come back to you and I will treat you with courtesy and kindness.  I will accept you for who you are and in time, maybe, you will begin to see that I will not let your attitudes and behavior change mine.

I am happy, therefore, I will make others happy!

Terie

You get what you need

There are often times when we (people) look at what others have and wished we had it ourselves.  Don't say not me, everybody has something they wished was different about themselves. Height, weight, hair, material possessions, relationships, etc. etc. the list goes on.  I believe there is nothing wrong with that... with wanting something.  I think it's natural to want things.  It's not OK to destroy what one has in an effort to get what one wants.

Let me explain this mess because I think right about now my Spanish to English mental translation is getting the better of me.

I have a good friend who is the most organized person I have ever met. Everything has a place, not a speck of dirt anywhere, laundry always done and put away, dishes always done, etc... I often wished I could be more like her. I even tried to be more like her.  I was exhausted by the end of the week and felt like a slave to my home and a maid to my children.  I'm not saying that she is any of these things but whatever she's doing, she has been doing for a long time and therefore this is not a struggle for or a job.  For me it wasn't just a change in how I handled daily chores, it was the constant need to change myself, my way of thinking and seeing life through the eyes of another person. I could not understand at the time, why I couldn't keep up the way she did, but soon I gave up the idea and went back to doing what I knew.

There was another time that I envied my cousin's hair.  We come from the same family line but she has what some in my family call "good hair" and I did not.  That just meant that someone should have taken the time learn and then teach me how to manage my own tresses.  I think this is where it all began.  People comparing me to my peers formed a person who felt inferior to others either because of looks, abilities or possessions.  Thankfully, I educated myself and learned quite a bit about people, behavior, personalities and how to avoid going down a path of self destruction.

I've learned that the grass is really always greener on the other side.  I remember people would say that to me and I never really knew how to translate that to make any sense to me.  My brain was always thinking "I grew up in the city, we didn't have much grass to talk about" or "what grass?"  Anyway, I figured it out, eventually.

Everybody has their issues. Everybody wants something they can't have. No one is completely happy all the time.  But most of us learn to deal with our issues, we learn to be OK with the want and content with what we have, and most important, we learn to strive to be happy and make others happy 100% of the time.

I am content with what I have, what I have accomplished and most of all, with the family that I can call my own.  I could not ask for a better husband (yes, there are times that I do ask for the impossible), I have beautiful, healthy, intelligent kids (let me brag, they're mine, all mine) and while I do admire what others have, how well they keep their home, and how easy it is for them to excel in their area of talent, I can honestly say that I am happy to be who I am today. Life would be so boring if we were always getting what we wanted.

You can't always get what  you want

But if you try sometimes, you just might find,

You get what you need! (Rolling Stones)

Embrace life - seize the moment

Sometimes little things happen that we just completely miss because we're all too busy to take a moment to notice the beautiful things in life.  I often find myself too busy to eat healthy, too busy to play with my toddler, too busy to do homework (that's never a good thing), worst is when I'm too busy to just be and really enjoy every moment in life with and without the kids.

I visited Dayne at TheHappySelf.com yesterday and here is what I first read:


"Everyday you are surrounded by sheer beauty.

The question is, are you feeling it, are you aware of it…or are you too busy in your mind?

The beauty could be in the form of a rising sun, the sound of your child’s laugh, the flowing steam off a fresh morning coffee, or that beautiful and coy smile from a stranger on your way to work."

His words made me think, a lot about the things I miss because I need to finish the dishes or vacuum the living room.  I realized that life is not in a clean room or in an empty sink (although it is good to clean those things).  I read on to learn that beauty is not something we see or feel, instead it is something we experience, it is invisible and undetectable, as Day explains.

I encourage you to visit his blog to read more about the 5 Most Beautiful Things in Life that are Invisible

~~~~~~~~~~~

As for seizing the moment, here's a photo of a fine example of something I would have missed.  Instead I ended up laughing my butt off...check it out.

My poor kitty, Tiger.  The toddler said he had to feed the cat so I didn't give it a second thought.  He came in and out of the kitchen several times, the last time he had a tissue in his hands, which he said was "to clean the kitty cat" and I though "oh no cat throw up...eewww."  So I came into the living room to find this..the cat wearing a bib and the toddler feeding her with a spoon.  It was hillarious!  I had to laugh.  The cat is looking at me as if to say "are you really going to allow this to go on? This is wrong, really wrong!"