Really missing my honey :-(

"I Love You"

When my husband travels for one or two weeks at a time I don't usually fret about it.  I miss him but not so much that I feel the need to write or talk about it.  I am one of the guilty military wives crazy enough to admit that I do like it when he travels for short periods of time.  Not only does it give us a little space and time to miss each other but I also get a little break from the old routine (cooking, laundry, his favorite TV shows).

This last week he had to go back to the states, except this time he left stressed and he was traveling due to a family emergency.  He had to help his brother and that is most definitely important. However, I felt he was already gone the week before so I was ready for him to go and be physically there, getting answers.

This time I felt a real separation.  He left with nothing but his brother on his mind, didn't even know school was starting soon and didn't call to ask the girls how that was coming along.  Didn't call to ask how we were doing or if the baby was doing well.  I felt resentment, I felt selfish for thinking he should call and remember all these things.  I felt guilty for thinking he should be able to handle both, the urgency back home and the routine here on the island.  I thought he should be able to turn off the emotional concerns and stress being brought on by the events surrounding his brother and his parents and focus on HIS family just for a little bit.  I was afraid that his coming home would mean he would still have his mind there and not here.

I realized, this morning, that aside from the fact that I'm feeling a little more hormonal than usual this week, I have also been holding everything inside. Not crying, not being upset, not allowing myself to get stressed and not talking to anyone who might make me feel less then happy.  I continued my routine at the gym, the kids, the chores and to-do's of the day and stayed strong because after all, I have to be strong for my kids and for my husband...someone has to.

I finally let it all go today.  I broke down and cried, told my husband how I felt and how sorry I was for feeling the way I did and thinking what I thought about him.  I am not usually one to hold things in because I know that those things will make me unhappy and cranky.  It's pointless to worry from the inside out without doing anything to change the situation.  

So now I'm back to being me.  Realizing that my husband is not worried about his wife, kids, home because he knows I am strong and will take care of everyone.  On this mission he should only have to worry and think about his brother who needs him.  If he were to call everyday I might be offended that he didn't trust me.  Instead I am proud to have him in my life and happy that he trust me enough to not worry about what's happening here at home.  I am so glad I can provide him with that much sanity when things go crazy elsewhere!

He's on his way home and feeling great.  He is leaving his brother in good hands and in better shape then when he first arrived.  I'm glad I wasn't a source of stress for him,  I love him and I miss him, that's all!

~Terie

Visiting family and friends

Well this has been a fun filled travel week for us.  We are currently in Pennsylvania with father in law (FiL), have already visited Great Grandma, uncles, aunts and cousins in New Jersey, college orientation for Josh and soon we travel to Delaware and then back to Virginia until moving date.

Whew! That's exhausting.  This is when we appreciate having a big Chevy conversation that seats 7 and hold a week worth of stuff.  I generally keep 2 trash bags in the car for easy clean up, 2 coolers with traveling snacks and drinks, a bag of toys and books and of course some electronics to keep kids entertained.  Oh and lets not forget the good old GPS for detouring when traffic gets ugly - that is definitely a life saver.

The kids have visited the local Zoo with daddy and the park where their dad used to play when he was a kid.  We are planning to visit the King of Prussia Mall in a few minutes here-- it's time to let the baby run himself tired.  You ever been there...it's a big mall with more stores than I can handle but it's fun to walk through it.  It's a bit on the expensive side for me so there's a lot of just dreaming going on --Ha ha!!

Daddy has been reconnecting with old friends and with his brother, going night fishing and catching nothing but good stories and a few mosquito bites but it's the quality of time that matters right? No?  A big fish for dinner would have been fantastic, maybe tonight.

Time to go "window" shopping at KoP Mall Plaza and The Court.  Look forward to sharing more about wine from Neil, more about our trip, and more about life.  Have a great week everyone!!

Happy New Year - traveling with kids

Here it is, the new year, 2009! It is hard to believe a whole year has gone by. It seems like just the other day I was nursing a baby and waiting for hubby to email or call from Iraq. He's been home a year, the baby is now 2 and my oldest is getting ready for college. WOW!! So many new things have happened in the last 12 months like my 6 year old reading a chapter book. She has fallen in love with the adventures of Ruby Gloom by Rebbecca McCarthy and my teen girl who avoided reading anything is now addicted to reading. I never thought I'd hear myself saying, "put that book down!" The two year old is repeating everything he hears and that's just scary sometimes. It's amazing how much language development there is between 2 and 3 years old. I love it!

Some things we learned during our vacation-- we drove from the Virginia Peninsula to New Jersey - midway up the state. On the way back we hit Pennsylvania, Delaware and Northern VA. We learned that:

--some people don't realize their showers don't work because the kids never complain and the adults never use that particular bathroom. We used several showers and had many different sleeping arrangements along the way. The showers went from a trickling drip out of the shower head to a shower with uncontrollable temperature to the best one which was a strong, perfectly warm, long lasting shower. You never know what's coming so be prepared to skip a shower if necessary - carry lots of personal wipes :-)

--it is best to force kids to use the bathroom before a long drive or you will be making many stops, sometimes, one per child...grrr!

--packing the makings for a meal is more cost effective and takes up a bit of time if stuck in traffic - so we pack a soft cooler with peanut butter, jelly, apple sauce, fresh fruit, drinks, snacks a butter knife and a small cutting board to prepare lunch on the go. The meal is fresh and nothing goes to waste.

--pack lots of books, magazines, crayons, coloring books, etc. Reading is a great way to pass the time.

--charge all electronics (DVD players, car games, iPods, cell phones, etc) a day before the trip and keep extra batteries and a small screw driver in the car for toys that require them, just in case.

--a GPS unit is a really good thing to have when you want to avoid massive traffic jams or at least to find a detour in the event of unforeseen traffic jams. We borrowed one and it saved us a good four hours.

--finally, it is important to be realistic and tell the kids how long the ride will be. If they don't really understand the concept of time, create a game in advance to help them count down the hours, i.e. draw a clock on construction paper and put an x on the clock number for every hour that passes then you'll know how many are left to go.

I hope these tips will help others planning to go on the road. I would love to hear from you and what tricks help you when traveling with children or just to keep you busy on the road.

Have a wonderful weekend everyone! My trip isn't over, going home today {{sigh}}.