I live in what one would consider to be a tight knit community. During my time of ignorance I loved the idea that everyone got along, everyone was nice and civil to each other, no one went around bashing anyone, and I truly believed with all my heart that the people here were special because even if they didn't exactly like someone, they would still try to be kind to them and share the same space and time in honor of peace, laughter and joy.
Well, that's not the case and my eyes have been opened. People here are just like people everywhere else. They can be catty, ignorant, rude, annoying, and inconsiderate. The only difference is that here we only have "us" there is no other community, there is no other church, there are no other schools, gyms, grocery stores or ball fields. Here we will come in contact with each other. Don't get me wrong. If you take these individual groups and set them outside of the circle of people they don't like, they are a fun group.
The problem here is that there is a huge break in the natural way of things. For example, if I throw a party and invite everyone I know (a lot of people) some might not attend simply because the person or persons they don't like will be at the party. That would probably not be a problem if it was just that one person. However, that one person has a best friend and now the best friend wont go either because they want to support their friend, understandably so. Before you know you have a group of people not socializing with me because I socialize with someone they don't like. Surely by now you must see how this is sounding like High School.
Sometimes we get stuck on the things we don't like about people and fail to see how that person might be an asset in our lives, how they just might make a huge difference and even become a trusted source. I believe it is extremely important to overcome the disagreements that generally happen among people and move on. If I chose to disregard someone simply based first impressions or someone else's views of that person I would probably not have any friends and would likely be a very unhappy person making everyone else unhappy.
I choose to accept people for who they are, after all, I too have my quirks and expect others to accept me the way I am.
I choose to forgive and really FORGET because I hope that if apologize to someone, they will forgive me and not ignore me.
I choose to embrace every single person I meet and all that they bring to the table - some are chatty, some finish your sentences, some complain, some cry, some are always happy, some are sad, their beliefs and disbeliefs, their likes, dislikes and differences.
I believe that in order for people to really be happy they need to be able to appreciate others as they are. They need to respect the opinions of others without prejudice. Life would be so boring if we all agreed with each other.
Many speak of the Golden Rule which is repeated in many different religious beliefs but mainly in Judaism, Islam and Christianity "Treat others as you would want to be treated." Then why is it there are so many people who can't even follow this rule?
There will be times when my heart will be broken, my trust will be tested, and my life will be changed and I know during these times I will feel like I need to get revenge, make someone pay, or retaliate in some way. I also know that the feeling will pass and I will simply chose to learn from the situation. I hope to continue to be who I am today, happy, forgiving, loving and trusting. Life is just too short to hold on to bad feelings. I will forgive and I will forget!
Terie
You are such an amazing person and friend! I SO understand everything you're saying - it can be tough here, but the best thing to do is forgive people and move on. I feel like civility and kindness are a minimum requirement for humanity. Truly. You embody that and I am proud to call you my friend.
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